My friends are always right in front of me

I have wanted for so long to see our friendship documented in some way, perhaps even shared with others. Jill sent the book about two friends taking photos each day to stay connected, when many miles kept them physically distant. It inspired me to take this silly photo of my home office work station, I think you can see a framed photo I have displayed. It comforts me to see you both in my most chaotic moments (whilst finishing a project with Max tugging at my desk chair). For as long as I can remember whether in my college dorm room, at my basement desk in grad school and even now I have always kept a photo of the three of us nearby. Perhaps it helps me think clearly or reminds me two wonderful, brilliant women love me and always have my back.

Someone mentioned today that friends they made in childhood were really circumstantial. They became friends (and didn't stay friends) because they were the same age and in the same place at the same time. And only their friends made during adulthood understood the way they navigate through this world. It made me smile and stop for a brief moment to think back not on how we became friends but why we are still here navigating through this life together. I don't think I have all the answers but I know our strong commonalities and subtle differences have kept our friendship fresh over the years. And above all I believe we honor and respect our past but continue to grow our friendship and understand it may ebb and flow with life's curves, individual milestones and struggles. I just feel lucky knowing when we gather again and you are both standing right in front of me, my world is a little calmer, a little less chaotic and whole lot more fun.

Love you Em and Jill...see you very soon!

Max Timothy Krueger is 4 months old!

Well it has been quite some time since I posted anything. Life with baby Max is hectic but his giggling and smiles make it all worth while. Max entered the world on October 14, 2009 weighing 7 lbs. and about 19 inches long. He is now almost four months old and life is crazy. So far Max is cuter and cuter each day, learning and growing in so many ways. Still tough on naps, he is trying to sleep more at night - what can a baby do? I have decided when he wakes in the night to think of it like I wake up and need a drink of water, he must just be a little thirsty - that's all. How can you get too frustrated with a little one who just needs to quench his thirst?

Enough babbling, just wanted a bit of journal entry today to mark what is happening in Max's life. He loves the bjorn with Dad and enjoys singing with Mom. He and Bella get along just fine and I bet will be best pals soon. Max sits up with a little help, is trying some rice cereal at least once a day and just keeps getting stronger and stronger.

All for now - above is a pretty recent photo of him (from Christmas with his ARC onesie on). We just love the little guy to pieces.

Closing in on October 9th -- baby please join us!!

I do not have much interesting or riveting to say this day except baby Krueger is too comfortable and seems a little stubborn about coming to greet the world. Certainly I realize my due date is still three days yet, but I had such a strong feeling that this baby would come at least a little early -- now I am just not sure at all. A part of me appreciates this mystery, very little is left in life to surprise you and this is one thing no one can truly predict. So the mystery is fun, but anticipation and discomfort is starting to get a little heightened for me at this point.

A final close to simply share that I know our lives are about to dramatically change, I have heard so much from other parents -- you will never sleep again, you will not do much of anything the same ever again -- it might sound crazy but after our journey to get to this place, this parenting possibility -- I say bring it on! There is nothing more in this world that Tim and I desire than to see our healthy newborn here with us and with our family -- unless you have been through years of infertility it is so difficult to describe the yearning and the loss of something you never even had...and now we are closing in on October 9th, 2009, the day that yearning could turn to a new beginning. God bless everyone for sharing with us, supporting us and loving us. Even if you didn't know it -- friends and family like you, reading this right now -- carried us through and lifted us up. You helped us get to this moment, this time and our little family is forever grateful.

2 baby related videos

This is our first try at creating and uploading a video with our new camera. Bear with us as we navigate, hopefully the quality and content will get better once baby arrives!!


This video clip is Tim testing the low light feature as I am sorting through shower gifts, feeling a little overwhelmed at organizing:)

34 weeks and YES counting...

Here is a photo of us in Michigan City at the shower that Tim's family hosted for us. I don't think Lisa or Bern sat down much all day, it was very humid and warm but a lovely time.

Now at 34 weeks and I admit counting down. I still feel pretty comfortable and managing to run or walk every day -- we are just very anxious and excited to meet baby K. I think we might burst (and I literally am looking like I will burst:)...

Heading home to Rushville for the weekend to visit with my side of the family and a shower hosted by my Aunt Sheila and cousin Melissa -- looking forward to seeing dear friends and family. Tim is taking Sam golfing for the first time (Sam has been with Josh of course) but this will be the first time Sam & Uncle Tim venture out. Norm is planning to golf too - they will have fun while the ladies luncheon.

And today during lunch hour, my Red Cross co-workers are hosting a shower for me. It is truly amazing how generous and thoughtful people can be. Really warms my heart and almost makes me shed a tear thinking how much this baby is already loved and adored. I know Tim and I feel so connected and bonded to the baby and just love him/her to pieces -- I can only imagine how that love will grow once we actually meet baby face to face. Makes me smile just thinking of this moment.

I will sign off for now and wish you all well.

Lots of love!

Baby Krueger Update 28 - 29 weeks

Well the photo here is really fourth of July weekend at Nick & Aly's house - so technically week 27 ish. Anyway, we are doing well. Getting a bit more challenging to sleep through the night but I have never been a great sleeper anyway so pretty used to waking up during the night.

House projects are going well, little things here and there to do before baby comes are moving along. Tim has a brilliant idea to get our upstairs bathrooms rennovated before the baby comes, good news is that I think he has conceded to let someone else do the work, but we will see if that holds out. He really does an excellent job with projects, but I just hate for him to take up so much precious free time. And projects always end up being more time and more involved than you anticipate. Plus he has board exams when we return from Colorado so lots going on right now.

Baby K. is moving so much I don't even notice sometimes. We have both seen and felt movement which is just amazing. I really think the only time that goes by and I feel nothing for solid moments or minutes in a row is when I run or walk with Bella -- otherwise baby reminds me "hey, could you give me some more leg room in here?!!".

We head to Coldplay this weekend in Milwaukee and then to Colorado next Monday -- so baby is going to be traveling around a lot over the next few weeks. We also have two out of town showers in August (Rushville & M.C.), which will be fun and more traveling for baby; and I have a few days for work travel in Lake Geneva. I admit being a little nervous about all the travel, swelling up on the plane and just nervous to be nervous because that is what I do. But overall I know it will all be fine and baby will do great. Keep us in your prayers as we certainly will all of you, blessings to all until next time!

26 weeks with Baby K.

I am going to try and be better about using our blog. I know that Facebook is alternative, but I don't see us posting videos or personal stories in that medium. So for those interested, hopefully you will post comments and follow along on our journey to parenthood.

Tim and I are doing really well, just have lots of travel and activities this summer. Everything is fun stuff, but feels like we have packed everything into a few months. The Heil's just came for a visit and the Barth's & Normand's are coming next weekend. Then we have Coldplay concert with Tim's family and our Colorado vacation with my side toward end of July -- lots to anticipate!

We have already put up the crib in Baby K.'s nursery, makes everything feel very real. Both of us seem to stop cold at the top of our stairs now and just stare into the room, imagining a baby there in just a few months. I think sometimes we still cannot believe a baby will be in our family, a part of our lives -- still feel I need to pinch myself. Of course all the kicking and growing belly should remind me that I really am pregnant but the baby has been very kind to my body so far. We feel blessed that this pregnancy has been so joyful and that I am still doing everything I love including running (well really plodding now) with Bella.

All for now, lots of love to everyone.